So after deciding that enough is enough, I moved Jaedyn & I out of my apartment & into a friend's home. She's been so generous & kind to let the two of us stay here for free while we are anticipating our big move to Oklahoma. Watching Jaedyn, sharing dinners & spending time together, she's been a really great friend. Jaedyn & I will be living here until October, & already I'm learning that there was a reason God wanted me to be here with her. She's 10 weeks pregnant & her husband's gone (he's in the Air Force, so he's gone TDY a lot). She's had some issues with bad reactions to poison ivy & different things; it's a proven fact I was sent here for a reason. Its good to know that someone can need me.
As far as my relationship goes with Jaedyn's dad, its on the rocks often. I miss him all the time. Both yesterday & today, soldiers graduating from basic training came into the store & automatically, I thought of him. 11 days until I get to see him again. Its something to be excited about, but then again, Jaedyn will be away from me for 2 whole weeks & I'm just not too sure if I'm ready for that just yet. We hit a bit of a snag today that just really slapped me out of dream world & into reality that I'm still just as vulnerable as ever & anyone, including him, still has the power to break my heart. I wish it was something I could just get over, you know, leave the past in the past? Not punish someone for the mistakes that people before him made? Its just hard! I'm hoping things will get easier, but I guess you never really know these days!
I also decided today, I really would love to go back to school. Doing what? I have no idea, but I figure if I work on my basics, I'll figure it out once I know where this path in life is taking me. Work is just work these days. It used to be fun & enjoyable, but now I just find it a task to even smile while I'm there. & friends, well... they're scarce these days. Jaedyn's dad is my best friend. You just never really know who to trust these days & that's sad. People talk, people listen, words get turned around, rumors get started... the works. You'd think being 20 years old the high school drama would stop & it woulda have stayed in high school but apparently not. I'm just over it!
I'm over this town, I'm over KENTUCKY. I'm ready for a fresh new start & I'm glad that in t-minus 2 months, I'll get out of here for a while.
